Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Seeing Through the Eyes of a Bug

Once again my experience came to me while meditating in the park. I was sitting near a cluster of purple flowers extended onto long stems that swayed in the breeze. I felt a magnificent presence in the particular spot where I had chosen to tune in and I wanted to see if it was human or Angelic or possibly elemental.

After only a few seconds of tuning into the energies around me, with my eyes closed I noticed that I suddenly felt like I was swaying up and down and up and down. In front of me I noticed long stems from flowers but interestingly enough they were huge! I felt like my eyes were very large like those photos you see of aliens. I wondered at first if I could be connecting with an alien! I noticed that I could see from a larger perspective than normal. My peripheral vision seemed to have extended way beyond what is normal for me. However, what I noticed most of all was the swaying. In a few moments I realized I had connected with a bug! I initiated conversation with this bug. Knowing that bugs do not understand English, I know that the bug could sense the feeling of the thoughts I was trying to communicate. My first inclination was to ask what kind of bug it was, but I felt the impression of his thoughts to mine that bugs do not understand names or distinctions like we humans do. He just knew what he was and he was okay with that knowledge. I instantly was impressed with the feeling that there was peace in his existence. He did not fear being eaten by a bigger bug. He just accepted life as it was offered to him and enjoyed the moment of swaying in the breeze on the petal of a small flower.

I could not leave him without asking him if he wouldn't mind talking to the mosquito cousins of his and seeing if they could stop their incessant attacks on my skin. Yes I realize he doesn't understand names but he felt the essence of my request and he told me he would see what he could do.

I realize that there is no hierarchy in the reality of life. A bug's existence is just as important as we think we are. It is all relative. As I came back to myself and felt my feet standing on the ground beneath me I couldn't help but wonder if in reality I was just a bug on some leaf somewhere and that this world I lived in was really just a small piece of a larger existence and if beings larger than myself ever gazed at me and wondered at my small life.

I have noticed since my connection with this little creature that I have suffered less from bug bites. Maybe my request truly was heard. I have connected with the small creatures in the past and made requests, some of which were answered with a yes and some with a no, which I have written about in the past. Sometimes maybe they just want us to see life through their eyes, or maybe they would like to see life through ours. I wonder.......when I was connecting with this bug and seeing life through his eyes if maybe he was looking at life through mine. What a different connection that must have been.

Monday, June 20, 2011

Help Me to the Light

Recently my husband and I and a few friends visited  a historical site in Clearsprings Md.   A beautiful large estate on an expansive property, this house was built in the 1830's. It has a rich history and I felt honored to visit. Beautifully decorated with many period antiques, I immediately sensed a great deal of non physical energy there. At first I was not sure whether the energy was attached to the property or possibly the antique furniture. Most of the time I felt that the energy was content, but on occasion I would happen upon a very sad feeling. The feeling seemed to move from room to room. I started feeling the sadness in the dining room. Not a person who cries, I almost felt the urge to burst into tears. Not verbalizing this feeling at first, I wandered around the rest of the house from room to room. On occasion I would run into this feeling again, but I noticed if I verbalized the feeling of sadness or tried to pick up on its origin, it would quickly dissipate.

The opportunity came later to attempt to connect with the soul with whom this feeling of sadness rested. I connected with a young girl, possibly a teenager, who had come to visit the family who owned the property at some point in the past. I picked up from the connection with her that either before or during her visit here she had become pregnant which was not acceptable in this time period and especially because the father was African American. I was not sure if the act was consensual but I felt like it was. She had apparently stayed at this location until the birth of the baby and then sent home. She never got to see the baby or know any details of his life after that time. Apparently this traumatic experience had left a portion of her soul stuck in this house grieving the loss of her youth and her child. When I connected with her I assured her that there was no judgement coming from me or anyone else in the group and that we understood and felt her pain. This seemed to help. At first her energy kept coming and going and I would have to continually have to try to reconnect with her. I felt like she probably suffered from a lot of guilt and shame. After sending her the energy of love and light, I lost the connection but I hoped that she had gone to the "light"......

Later I was in the basement with another woman who mentioned that the last time she was in the basement her and another girl had picked up on their recorders......"help me to the light"......She mentioned that the energy felt better now than it had that night and I felt like maybe the voice was the voice of the young girl with whom we had connected. I mentioned that I would like to know if we had indeed helped her. I lost contact with her energy before I knew whether she had been helped or not. Immediately I felt her energy tell me that yes, she had found the light and that her son was there to greet her. She was extremely happy and grateful for the help. We walked through the house again and did not feel the feelings of sadness anywhere in the house that time.

It always feels good to help a fellow traveler through this maze we call life. Whether in body or in spirit, sometimes pieces of our souls get stuck in traumatic events. I am not saying that this girl I connected to was a "ghost", but the energy of this trauma and the emotions surrounding it had left an impression in the house. At least a portion of her soul was stuck here and needed to be released to the "light". Is this light "heaven?" I don't know. When she died was her soul stuck wandering around this earth and she somehow ended up here where this piece of her past "haunted" her? This I don't know either. I am thinking that sometimes pieces of our souls get stuck in events that are charged with emotion. We may die, cross over, even reincarnate, but a piece of our essence is "stuck" in this emotionally charged event. I am thinking that if I am able to bring healing and light to this part of a girl who suffered a trauma and cross her over into the "light", that maybe that portion of her soul that got left behind gets reunited with the part of her that crossed over when she died. Who knows. None of us knows. I am just guessing. I do know that when her soul came back and thanked me for the help I felt such joy as if all the Angels were celebrating. That is all that matters.

Friday, June 17, 2011

Another Incident in the Park

There is a fitness trail at the park which I have visited for many years. One portion of it runs very near some wooded areas, which have always made me feel uncomfortable. When I am running, I usually run quickly by this area. Until today it had never occurred to me to visit those wooded areas in my spirit body and see what was going on there.

Upon entering the area in my spirit body, I immediately knew that there had been at least one rape here. I felt a portion of the soul of at least one victim and at least one perpetrator. My normal response would have been to immediately go to the soul of the victim to offer healing first without a thought for the soul of the perpetrator, but I knew as a healer I must offer healing to both victim and perpetrator. Surprisingly, it was the soul of the perpetrator that first made contact. A portion of his soul was stuck here, feeling guilt and shame and yet at the same time helpless to change his behavior or find retribution. I knew that I must offer him the choice to feel love and light. His vibration at the time of the incident had attracted a low vibration spirit which had almost overcome him, making him helpless to act any other way but the way he had acted. The first thing I did was to offer him help and healing and show him the light of love. Apparently he had never been offered love before. He immediately embraced the light and the Angels took this portion of this soul into the light.

The soul of the victim was stuck there as well, but, not knowing for sure whether she was still living or not, I asked her if she wanted to return her oversoul. She was afraid that the incident would repeat itself and was unwilling to go back. I then asked the Angels to hold this portion of the victim's soul in their arms until the union could take place.

I felt the need to send loving energy all around the park as I made my way around the track, and at one point, my spirit guide the Crow came to me. Crow told me that a portion of his soul had witnessed the event and had repeatedly called out for help as the event occurred, and that its soul had been wounded in the attack as well, from feeling powerless to intervene. This surprised me, but immediately I sent love and healing energy to the Crow and any other creatures that had been nearby when the event occurred. I also felt the need to send healing energy into the land, and to extract any low energies of violence which had seeped into the ground.

I asked the Spirit of the Park if the healing work was complete, and she indicated that it was much improved. Upon my last visit around the portion of the trail that bordered the injured area, I noticed that the energy was much lighter. There were squirrels playing and a flock of birds frolicking around the area. I had not noticed any creatures playing around my first two times close to the edge of the woods. I asked for a sign from the Spirit of the Park that the work was complete, and within a few seconds a Crow landed in a tree within a few feet of me crowing incessantly.  This was the closest I had ever gotten to a Crow. I took this as a sign that the healing had taken effect and I thanked my Guides and Angels and the Spirit of the Park for their assistance and also for the idea of sending healing energy into this portion of the park. I am hoping that others in this area will visit the park and send loving energy into the wooded areas to seal the healing.

It amazes me to think that I have been walking or running this trail for twenty years or more and it just now occurred to me to send healing energy to the portion of the trail that has always made me feel uneasy. It just shows me that the urges from Spirit are always there, we are just not always listening.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

This Crowded World We Live In

In my last blog I wrote about a dream I had about going to the beach and for some reason we had taken along a lot of people I did not know. I wrote that I had decided the dream was about clutter, having things in my  life that were keeping me from enjoying myself. So apparently the message the Angels are trying to send me has not yet been resolved. Two days later, another dream of crowds of people, many of which I do not know. This time I was helping my daughter move, and so many people showed up to help that there were car loads of people everywhere. The street in front of her house and the driveway were filled with cars and people everywhere. Some I knew, some I did not. In this dream I did recognize that some of the people were relatives. There was an aunt and uncle who both recently passed, and all their living children and grandchildren. We were all happy to see each other, and everyone was busy visiting and also helping with the move.

Whenever I have similar dreams with similar scenarios I try to take notice. Why in the world am I dreaming about large crowds of people? I remember at one point in the dream the phone rang and it was my mother. I realized in the dream that my mother had passed so how could she be calling on the phone?

The thought occurs to me that we are all connected. I am connected in some way to the clerk at the grocery store, to every person I wait on at the Post Office, to the living, to the dead, to every person with whom I have ever had any interaction at all. When I write a blog and someone reads it, I am connected to the person who reads it and they are connected to me. When I go on vacation or help my daughter move, and I write about it in a blog, or I dream about it and write it in a blog, then every person who reads the blog for a moment is connected to me. Every person I connect with who is no longer in their physical body is connected to me for the moment that I am interacting with them. Then if I happen to write about an interaction with that person, and someone reads it, then that person who is no longer in body is connected to the person who is reading about them in my blog. If I talk about someone or make fun of them, then the thoughts I think and the words I say affect that person in a great way and they don't know where that energy came from. Both the words I say and the thoughts I think affect my world around me but it also affects the people who I talk about and the people who I talk wonder I am dreaming about crowds and crowds of people.

This should make us mindful of the words we speak and the thoughts we think. If every thought we think is a prayer, imagine what we are praying for!! No wonder so many of us find ourselves in so much drama. And if we think or speak of things repeatedly, that gives them even more power.

Just for today, I am going to try to focus my thoughts of others in a positive way. I am going to imagine that my interactions with others are all positive and enjoyable. That makes my life better and possibly their lives better as well. Try it. If we all attempt to make our interactions and our thoughts of others positive, think how we can raise the vibration of our world? We are living in a crowded world. We may as well enjoy each other's company.

Wednesday, June 8, 2011


A few nights ago I dreamed I was on the last day of my vacation at the beach. The day we were going to leave I was looking forward to one last day in the sun. However, before I was able to go out and enjoy my last day of fun, I needed to go to the doctor (this was a subtle sub-message from my Higher Self about taking care of a medical issue I was trying to ignore), and then I had to pack the car. It seems on this particular vacation, Clay and I had brought along a lot of people whom I did not recognize. We had to make sure they were all taken care of and then it seems that we had to pack a lot of stuff into our car. I don't mean regular vacation stuff. We were packing furniture, the shower curtain, large crates of some sort, things that you would not normally take on vacation with you. By the time we had taken care of all the details, you guessed it, it was too late to enjoy the last day of our vacation.

Normally I wake up from these dreams and I quickly forget them. Many times I wake up exhausted just from having so many details to take care of in my dreams. Later I casually commented to my husband Clay that I seem to dream a lot about clutter and he just gave me one of those...OH REALLY... looks...and the light went on.

Recently I have been contemplating how I can juggle my job at the Post Office with the stuff I really like to do, that is, helping people heal their emotional lives, giving messages, doing shamanic journeying, and also enjoy my favorite season, summer. The dream I just described is a recurrent one with different scenarios, but always there is a lot of things I am trying to pack into a car that seem unnecessary for the trip. Why would I need to pack up the shower curtain to go home? And the furniture?

The reason I share this is because I believe that many of us try to pack more into our lives than is necessary. I, for one, try to take care of more things than is my responsibility to take care of. My current focus is on eliminating what is not necessary for now and doing what brings me joy. Yes, I still have to go to work and pay the bills. Sure I would like to lay at the beach all summer and just come back in the fall, but that is not realistic at this time. However, I can eliminate the need to take everyone along on my journey (all the people we took along with us to the beach in my dream). By everyone I mean trying to take responsibility for everyone else's  life.......   The key to this dream was that I was already where I wanted to be (the beach) but I was so busy with details that I was not enjoying the trip. Most of us can relate to always thinking there is some point in the future when we will have reached our goals and will be able to say.. I have arrived. I have some news. You have already arrived. But sometimes the devil is in the details. There is stuff to pack, people to take care of, doctor visits, and before you know it, the vacation is over.

What I have decided is that I need to decide what it is that brings me joy and put the rest on the back shelf for now. No I am not quitting my job at the Post Office. I will just find ways to find joy in it. I will focus on the joy of having a steady job and a steady income. I will lay aside the need to fill up my time with stuff that is not joyful to me. I will find the feeeellling of joy and focus on that. Anything that is not giving me joy is clutter.  And yes, I cleaned out some drawers today and threw some stuff away. And as I did, I declared that I was decluttering my life....

The doctor visit is done, I have returned the furniture to the house and stopped trying to stuff it in my car and I am headed to the beach, so to speak. Time to enjoy life......


It is about 3 AM and I am lying wide awake in the bed, tossing and turning and realizing that sleep just isn't happening. I am reminded of a connection I made last week in the park with a woman named Anabelle.

It seems the city park lately has been the place I have been making some interesting connections with those no longer in body. There is a garden with various flowers and a stone path. I am not sure of the history of the garden itself, but the house nearby apparently has some history. Anyway, my husband and I enjoy going to the park, and after our exercise routine we frequent the garden, mostly because of the energy present there.

One particular day I was asking if anyone was there that wanted to communicate with me and I felt the presence of Anabelle. She told me she lived in body in the 1700's but was attracted to the garden partly because of the flowers but partly because she had noticed me. She obviously was not a wandering soul: she had crossed over but liked to come back and visit on occasion. Anabelle told me that we had conversed before but I still do not remember this interaction. Nevertheless, she told me that there were many that wished to communicate with the living but there weren't many living who were open to listening. The fact that I had opened the door to the possibility of communication had attracted some attention on the other side. What reminded me of this interaction now at 3 AM is that she reminded me that I often woke up in the wee hours of the morning unable to sleep and that at these times it might be helpful to get up and sit with Spirit and see who showed up. Up until now I have been resistant to that notion, because, as I reminded Anabelle, I work a full time job and I am one who needs to sleep. Yes, she replied, but if you are awake anyway, you might as well get up and listen.

Okay so I am listening. 

Friday, June 3, 2011

Crossing Over

Recently while attending a class on advanced techniques in Shamanic practices, I learned a new technique for crossing over the spirits of those who have become "stuck" or for some reason their essence did not "cross over" into the light after death.

These souls sometimes wander around after their death due to the trauma they suffered. Sometimes they do not realize they are dead. Sometimes, it seems, they have lost memory of what happened just prior to their death. Sometimes they fear that they have done something that prohibits them from entering into the light.

In my years prior to my introduction into Shamanic technique, I had never been introduced to the idea that displaced spirits need love and understanding. On television and in the religious circles to which I had been exposed, spirits that hung around or harassed or perhaps even "possessed" those of us who are living were to be feared and cast out, but never loved. The idea that these spirits needed to be given a voice to speak out their fears and apprehensions and perhaps to express the things that had happened to them prior to their death was a new idea to me, but one that I immediately embraced. It only makes sense that those spirits who elect to stay around the earth realm when given the choice probably have some unfinished business here. Perhaps they felt the need to find a lost loved one, not realizing that the loved one they were looking for had long since passed. Perhaps they felt unworthy of the light, or perhaps they just couldn't remember what had happened to them prior to their death and they didn't understand how they had ended up where they found themselves.

It only makes sense that in order for a soul to feel comfortable going to the light, they must first be exposed to the light of love and compassion. In this work there is no danger of that spirit attaching itself to those who are giving them a voice, because those of us assisting these spirits cross over are of the light, and if these spirits are afraid of the light of the other side, they will not desire to attach themselves to lightworkers. Instead we give them a voice, let them voice their concerns, their fears, allow them to realize that they have passed, and perhaps help them to see beyond the traumatic event that precipitated their death. It seems that when these spirits realize that the event has passed then they are free to see the light.

The theory is that energy follows thought, so it is believed that if you speak of those who you have crossed over then it is possible that the energy of thinking and talking about them could have the effect of drawing them back to the earth realm. However, suffice it to say that there are many spirits who have found peace through this method. Because of this theory I am not going to give specific examples at this time, but after some time has passed, perhaps it would be okay to tell their stories.

We can learn so much from this practice. If the dead need love and understanding, how much more the living who we interact with every day? If we have those who we are around on a continual basis who rub us the wrong way, or perhaps we have anger or unforgiveness towards, how does the energy of our thoughts and words affect them? How does the energy of others affect us? It behooves us to take thought of how we speak of others and what energy we continually give out to those we love and those we love a little less. Remember that the thoughts we think and the words we speak is the energy that is drawn towards us. If we feel harassed by spirits that are not alive then perhaps their energy is drawn to us because of our fears or dark thoughts or words. If you happen to be sensitive to them, perhaps they are looking for some understanding or someone to listen to them.

Let us give thought to all those, living and dead, who need our love, our compassion, and our understanding. Let us offer them the gift of nonjudgment, acceptance, and perhaps, after they have given voice to their fears, will see the light.