So the month of September was my month of quiet. I was not trying to post messages from Spirit on my blog. I spent more time alone. I tried to meditate more frequently than usual. Some days I was more successful than others in my quest for spiritual contemplation.
I still drew a tarot card every day. Most of the time they were fairly good cards. I can't say that the entire month was spent receiving amazing inspiration and Angelic guidance. Most of the time the Voice that speaks to me was silent as well. I took this as a message that this was my month to reboot.
We all need that time when we reboot our internal computer. Just turn everything off and allow ourselves time to just enjoy our everyday lives. Get outside. Rescue a squirrel. Clean the pond.
I still enjoyed teaching some classes and seeing a few clients. When the connection needed to be on, it did not let me down.
In the past week or so, however, I drew this card. More than once.
The first time I drew this card I took it as a message that it might be a difficult day. I might have to work hard to make any headway.
The second day I drew this card was only a few days later. Hmmmm.
I took this as a message that I didn't get the message the first time. (ha ha.. yes sometimes this happens.)
So I asked the card.. "what are you trying to tell me?"
I heard, " describe what you see.."
I saw the man. The wands (representing ideas, inspiration, etc.) were firmly planted behind him. He is holding one in his hand. He is looking off to the side. He is a bit wounded in the head but seems to be mostly okay. There is a bit of a scowl on his face.
"Joy, getting to where you are has not been easy. You have worked hard to learn the things you have learned, to accomplish the things you have accomplished. Along the way at times you have felt like you have been "wounded" by those who are not on the same page as you.. correct?"
"Yes, I guess you are right."
"It is time to let go of those battle scars. It is time to release and forgive any who have intentionally or unintentionally sent you energy that was less than loving or helpful."
I have been reading E-Squared, a book that gives you experiments on energy and teaches us that we are all connected, a concept which I already know and believe, but the particular chapter I had been reading had taught me that my thoughts, sent out toward another human being, are captured by their energy and known at a deep, if not unconscious level. I had always kind of wondered if the thoughts of others, directed at me at a critical or unloving level, could affect me, and this book theorizes that, yes, it does affect us. I had heard arguments both ways, some saying that negative energy directed toward us does not affect us if we are walking in love. Others say that, yes, it does affect us, just as if we love our plants and send them kind thoughts and words they grow better, a fact that can be documented by experimentation. Or that the thoughts we send our bodies has a factor in our appearance. Or that the thoughts we send others is "heard" by their energy bodies.
We are all guilty of sending less than loving thoughts out toward others. How about that inefficient store clerk? How about that driver who cut you off in traffic? How about your spouse who points out your shortcomings but seems to be unaware of theirs? I think you get the direction I am heading.
My conversation with this tarot card seemed to be urging me to let go of my battle scars.
I thought I had done that long ago.
However, just to placate the "messenger" within the card, I decided to forgive and send loving thoughts to everyone who came to my mind who could, in my estimation, possibly have less than loving thoughts about me, or, for whom I could have less than loving thoughts about towards them.
I imagined myself giving each person who came to my mind the gift of a ball of light, symbolizing the light of love and acceptance. For if I say "forgiveness", I assume that there is something to forgive, or an offense that is in need of releasing the weight of. However, who am I to assume there has even been an offense? In "acceptance", I am saying in essence that there has been no offense, and I am completely accepting of that other person and any discrepancy in our words or thoughts. I thought it important to release any and every person who I have come into contact, either in person or by just the mere fact of having come into contact by some sort of communication (for example, by reading something that I have written or they have written). I also completely loved and accepted anyone from any previous lifetimes or even lives between lifetimes for whom there may have been any offense or assumed offense.
Is there someone or a group of someones for whom you have gained "battle scars?"
Are you holding onto those wounds, nursing them sometimes, or perhaps, wishing for some retribution?
Is there someone for whom you wish a less than loving "retribution"?
It is time to release those thoughts!! Believe it or not, your thoughts are like arrows in that person's energy field! It might be that they are small and relatively harmless, such as that "you idiot!" remark as you slam on your brakes due to someone's driving skills. Have you ever had a sharp pain in your body that came and went relatively quickly? Who's to say that someone was not sending you a "thought dagger"?
I don't want to be the recipient of a "thought dagger" so I want to make sure I am not the perpetrator of one.
And then there are those "thought daggers" we send to ourselves.
But that is another blog for another day.
I love you all.
Thanks for reading.