It's Okay to Break the Rules Sometimes.. Lessons Learned from Officiating Weddings

This blog breaks a little from my normal tradition of writing blogs based upon messages that I receive from time to time from the Spirit world. If you have visited my website or followed me on Social Network sites, you know that I also don the hat of wedding officiant, in addition to my gift of delivering messages from Spirit and teaching spiritual classes.

I like to think that for every hat that I wear, whether it be Post Office clerk, wedding officiant, or messenger for Spirit, that I always allow Spirit to be there in charge, lighting my way and guiding my words and actions, but sometimes I will admit that for weddings in particular, I am always very attentive to making sure I am doing every little thing right, and saying the script word for word. When I teach classes, I normally don't even look at my notes, but not so for weddings.

Recently, however, Spirit urged me to lighten up a bit. I always try to make sure every little detail is covered and that the ceremony goes off like clockwork, but, if you have ever attended a wedding, this sometimes does not happen.

Take, for example, a recent outdoor wedding where a neighborhood cat decided to come up and begin to sharpen its claws on the trellis while the couple were saying their vows.

The cat offered some laughter of which I was glad, because I was stressing about another detail of which I did not know how to remedy. The bride and groom were standing on tiles placed on the ground so that everyone would know where to stand and also so that the bride and bridesmaids in their high heel shoes would be more comfortable than having their heels stuck in the ground. It seemed to me that someone placed the tiles for the bride and groom too far apart, and both of them seemed afraid to step off of their tiles, and I did not want to interrupt the ceremony to ask them to get a little closer. Looking back, I wished I had spoken up. After the ceremony I went home and beat myself up over and over again about how I wished I had noticed the tiles sooner and moved them closer together. Or I wished I had encouraged the bride and groom to move off of their tiles and get a little closer.

Sometimes I get messages from Spirit while doing the most mundane tasks, and it seems that even preparing for a wedding is no exception. One afternoon I was dressing for a wedding and I had in my mind decided what I was going to wear, right down to which pair of shoes I would don. At the last minute, after putting on the shoes I had already chosen, I decided that they were not comfortable that day and decided on another pair. I heard Spirit say to me in my heart that sometimes it is okay to change our minds, even if we have already put the wheels in motion for certain decisions. This was a personal message for me, and the message from Spirit had nothing to do with which shoes I had chosen to wear. This was a message of surrender, that my plans can change, and even if I feel I have been led by Spirit to go down a certain path, that I have to be willing to surrender my plans and allow things to change, even if I have already put certain things in motion.

It seems that Spirit knows when I am going to need the messages that come to me. The next day, a wedding did not go at all as planned and I was forced to ad lib a bit of the ceremony! What!! AD LIB?  Me, a Capricorn, a stickler for staying within the lines, doing everything completely according to plan? AD LIB? Because I had decided to lighten up and go with the flow, I did not flip out or beat myself up over and over afterward as I did the day before about the tiles that were too far apart.

I am thinking to myself that most people are better at going with the flow than others and may be laughing at the silly things I stress out about.

I have a really good one. One day last fall I had booked two weddings on the same day. I had not allowed any time to eat, so I was driving to the first wedding eating some peanut butter to take the edge off. Unbeknownst to me, I had dropped a dollop of peanut butter right smack in the middle of my dress, and I didn't notice it until after the wedding was over. Now, if you didn't know that peanut butter was peanut butter, can you think of something else it might resemble?  I was horrified. I am sure all in the wedding party had a good laugh at my expense.

 I used to use my Kindle to read the wedding ceremonies. I liked it because I did not have to flip pages. Once my Kindle froze up right smack in the middle of the ceremony. Needless to say I no longer use  my Kindle for wedding ceremonies. And I no longer eat peanut butter on the way to a wedding.

Whether you are planning your wedding or just a vacation to Disney World, it is really helpful to allow for things not going as planned. If you have given your life over to serve Spirit, the same is true. Sometimes classes are not attended. Sometimes people cancel at the last minute. Sometimes people don't like you!! What???

I guess, with it being the day before the dark moon, this blog can have this for a theme: SURRENDER. The dark moon is all about releasing what is no longer working. Or releasing whatever. For me, it is releasing the need to have everything go perfectly ever single time.

Make your plans. Do your work. Be prepared. But, in the end, surrender all  that to Spirit. Sometimes the things you have planned will go like clock work. And then sometimes they won't. If there are tiles placed on the ground, so to speak, and you are expected to stand on them, and in your heart you know that they are too far apart, don't be afraid to step off the tile.